Three Letters are Worth a Thousand Words
Maybe it is just a culmination of things that have been transpiring for years, or maybe it’s just a simple run of bad luck. But I’ll tell you something kids, if you think your life sucks, just get a load of this big bag of flaming poop. You see, I am getting tired of seeing these three letters everywhere now: FML. I don’t feel the need to tell you what those three letters stand for as I am sure that you already know. FML!! FML!! Yes, you see this all the time in text messages, Facebook updates, Twitter, etc.. “Oh, my boss is so mean, FML!” or “Oh, I got my car washed today and then it started raining, FML!” Well, I have something to say to all you cry babies out there: F-Y-L. Yes, FYL!! If you know what I mean.
Did you have to spend the coldest three weeks of the year in a house without a functioning heater?? No, you say? Then FYL!
Do you have to pop your hood at least once a day because there is a bad connection on your battery terminal that likes to be played with before it will allow your car to start? Didn’t think you did. FYL!!
Are you dumb enough to continue to let an ex into your life for about the 13th time only to be stabbed in the back once again?? Will you hopefully learn something from this and allow me to continue making the same mistake over and over?? Thanks. You’re wonderful and FYL.
Do you consider the regulars at the bar your family because it’s been so long since you’ve actually seen your own? Oh, your entire immediate family lives within a 90 mile radius of your home? That’s wonderful! Give your mom a slap on the butt for me and FYL.
Did you run out of gas not 50 yards from a gas station last week only to walk up and find the damn thing closed?? Oh, you’re one of those boy scout assholes that carries around a gas can with you. Sweet. Light a match and pour some on yourself and FYL.
I guess things have to get better. I don’t see how they can’t. Perhaps I’ll play the lotto tonight and see what happens. And if I happen to win, I think I’ve got three letters for you. Guess what they are.
*Well, that was certainly uplifting. A special "Thanks" to Swany for sharing his zest for life, and his passion for all things optimistic....
